Lorry crashes into narrowboat

In the long and storied history of traffic accidents, there are some classic pairings: car versus lamp post, cyclist versus pothole. But on the Llangollen Canal this weekend, a new, and frankly baffling, category was born: lorry versus narrowboat.

A large red lorry, which had seemingly forgotten the fundamental difference between a B-road and a canal, was found nose-to-stern with a narrowboat named 'The Serendipity'. The subsequent exchange was less about insurance details and more about sheer, dumbfounded silence from all parties, including a particularly confused-looking pheasant on the towpath.

"The sat-nav said 'bear left'," the lorry driver was heard explaining to a constable. "It didn't mention anything about the 'left' being, you know, a canal. I was looking for a lay-by, not a waterway. To be fair, the boat wasn't indicating." The boat's owner, Gerald, who was in the middle of making a bacon butty, was remarkably calm about the whole affair. "Felt a bit of a nudge," he said, peering out of his galley window. "I thought I'd just bumped the bank. Came out and there's a 12-tonne truck trying to moor up alongside me. It's not ideal, I'll grant you. Nearly spilt my tea."

The incident caused no serious damage, apart from to the lorry driver's pride and Gerald's nerves. It serves as a stark reminder to all motorists: while canals are beautiful, they are not, and have never been, part of the strategic road network. No matter what your sat-nav tells you.